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lakilester:

No one get’s lynched for exfoliating is the greatest come back I’ve ever witnessed.

(via clipboards)

Dad on cultural appropriation. (conversation was in Spanish)

Me: Hey Dad, I have a question
Dad: Alright, lets see if it's within my reach
Me: What do you think of cultural appropriation?
Dad: what?
Me: Cultural appropriation.
Dad: I think you mean acculturation.
Me: yeah, I do. But I was using the term the Social Justice Morons use.
Dad: It's a necessary part of being human, you can't just keep the one culture all of your life!
Me: So how offended would you be if a bunch of white people started speaking Spanish?
Dad: Offended? I would be glad, at least they speak my language!
Me: What if a white guy made tacos?
Dad: what kind of taco? why would I be offended? Did I invent it and patent it?
Me: Nope, just an ordinary taco made by a white guy.
Dad: Why would I be offended? It would like a German guy getting offended because I grilled a hamburger
Me: Well, because it's a Mexican food, it was discovered and is integral to Mexican culture. What if a white person doesn't respect the history of the taco.
Dad: When the woman who first created a taco did that, did the Angels descend from heaven with a deed and a copyright form signed by God informing us that only Mexicans can make it?
Me: Nope. It's just a taco.
Dad: Precisely, it's a taco, eat it. I would actually be happy for that white guy, tacos are pretty good.
Me: What if Tyler wanted to celebrate El Dia de Los Muertos? On his own?
Dad: Tell him to pace himself the skulls are made of pure sugar.
Me: What if he wanted to celebrate El Dia de la Independencia?
Dad: Culture is not something handed to you by God to protect and nurse, it's just something that happens to you, and when you think you have it figured out, it changes. That's what cultures do. They change. You know what these people are trying to do, right?
Me: Yeah,
Dad: They want us all to hate each other and not speak to each other. They want us Mexicans in Mexico, Afro-Americans in Africa, Asians in Asia and none of us talking or being nice to each other. With no resources, no trade, no rights, and only the one language that only we're allowed to speak so that we can't communicate with anyone outside. And that's after they'd kill off all the white people. They're like the KKK, if the KKK didn't have balls.
Me: I arrived at the same conclusion.
Dad: Make yourself a coffee.
Dad:
Dad: Just be sure it's Mexican *laughs*

dallonvveekes:

isnt that a panic at the disco album

(Source: lvloonlight, via deceiviing)

rickydillon:

shutupaubrey:

the best moment in film history

ICONIC

(Source: mariahcareys, via cas-is-deans-huggy-bear)

(Source: jmeswilson, via thetypicalblogger)

unclefather:

ibebro:

unclefather:

i’m so old

it was actually 14 years ago, you are not with math

you’re not with math either

(Source: safe-net, via thetypicalblogger)

the sharp knife
of a short life

[x

(Source: edgeworthies, via officialfgt)

captain-mochlum:

WARNING! VERY IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!

The FBI virus has now upgraded into real life. If you find it at your doorstop, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU TOUCH THE LINK or else the virus will be installed into yourself.

If you click it by accident, go to your doctor and install Malaware into yourself and do a scan. The virus will be INSTALLED INTO YOU and there will be no exit button and it will say you have to pay a fine to get rid of it. DO NOT PAY IT since it will not make it go away. 

To get rid of it, contact your doctor IMMEDIATELY and get it uninstalled from yourself. 

SIGNAL BOOST THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW!

(via sniffing)

dicksplit:

Answering a question your teacher thinks you don’t know the answer to

image

(via thetypicalblogger)

mattyofshadow:

deluxesherlock:

bacon-lettuce-and-timmyturner:

fineas-and-pherb:

Best backstory. (x)

You know…for a second there…his head shape led me to believe he could be Phineas’s father.

whA T

NO BUT THAT WOULD EXPLAIN WHY PHINEAS IS SO INVENTIVE OH MY GOD

(via shorten)

dear-monday:

if this isn’t the best thing you’ve seen all day then I don’t know what to tell you

(via deceiviing)

incredulousbeliever:

dionthesocialist:

It’s hilarious that non-Americans on Tumblr are all like “OMG DENNY’S TUMBLR MAKES ME WISH I LIVED IN AMERICA SO I COULD EAT THERE,” while us Americans will literally only eat at Dennys if it’s 3 in the morning and we’ve lost control of our life.

You don’t go to Denny’s. You end up at Denny’s.

(Source: dion-thesocialist, via cas-is-deans-huggy-bear)

oimatchstickman:

wobbufetts:

aidn:

how the hell do i talk to people

Stand in front of them and press A

image

(via cas-is-deans-huggy-bear)

adirred:

rebekyboo:

timelordy-teganbreann:

seblaine:

australian adverts are slowly becoming my favourite

omg

image

This rivalry’s heating up.

(via soiups)